RE: The things being said about me by Kallie Plagge. This will likely be long. The first thing I want to say is that I don't believe Kallie is a liar. We were friends once, at least I thought. I considered her one of my only friends at IGN.
What I believe is that I overestimated or perhaps misread the degree of our friendship. She would share very personal things with me looking for advice and support, and so I thought I could do the same. As it turns out, she thought of me more as a mentor than a friend.
So when I say I do not believe she is a liar, I mean to say, I believe she felt uncomfortable with our level of friendship, but being younger, perhaps was scared to say so. I have no desire to embarrass her, or myself by sharing screens of every conversation we had as proof.
There are legal limits to what I am allowed to say about the allegations she made against me, or the investigation that resulted. What I can say is that just prior to her making a complaint, I was told by a mutual friend, and then had it confirmed by Kallie that she had felt uncomfortable about the nature of our friendship. As soon as I learned this, texted her an apology, told her I had no idea how I had made her uncomfortable, but that it didn't matter how...I was simply sorry to have made her uneasy.
I have screen grabs of our final exchange uploading, in which I made this apology, and in which she thanked me for acknowledging her feelings and need for space. She wouldn't tell me what I had done (which is fine) but we left it at that. A week later the accusation came.
I complied fully, though I was never told exactly what I had specifically done to make her uncomfortable. I handed over my phone, and screen grabs of nearly every conversation we had had in the prior months. I said I was willing to do whatever I had to to make her comfortable.
After almost two weeks of working from home, a resolution was reached, and I was found to not have harassed her. I was asked to change seats to make her more comfortable, and I was happy to comply. We were both told to keep correspondence strictly work-related, which I did.
From that point on I kept as far away from her as I could. Since I had no idea what exactly I had done, I didn't want to risk upsetting her further. I spoke to her in person for work related issues once or twice, and by email several times in the months until she left IGN.
Despite not knowing how I might have hurt her, I was wracked by guilt and fear. Inevitably, we'd pass in a hall or have to be in a meeting together and I'd try to stay as far as I reasonably could. Again, I considered her a friend, and I felt badly for the whole thing.
All of this being said, I want to make something abundantly clear: I never touched Kallie in any sexual way, unless you think a very occasional hug is sexual. I never said anything lewd about her or her body. I never made any advances towards her. Nothing.
The only talk of any sexual nature that occurred would be when she voluntarily shared things of a personal nature to me, as friends sometimes do. I didn't graphically describe anything or force sexual conversations on her or anyone. That is not who I am, or will ever be.
I understand this will be emotional for many. All I can ask is please, whoever you believe, do not go piling on her. She doesn't deserve that. No one does. This was a very sad, tense, horrible thing for her I'm sure, as it was for me. Be respectful and kind. Please.
I've said about as much as I legally can or care to. Once I get these images of my apology and last exchange with her up, I will post it for posterity and that will be all. Since all of this rocked my life and hers, I've thought long and hard on what I perhaps might take away from this to make sure I both protect myself, and never inadvertently make someone I respect and care about feel so awful. I hold myself to a high standard, and will continue to. I hope Kallie and I can both find peace and healing.
With one final note, I want to say that no matter who you believe, no one has the implicit right to trample anyone's boundaries. Be your best self, and if someone tells you you've hurt them, apologize and be better. That's all I've got.https://twitter.com/Vincogneato/status/ ... 6167038976